Tag Archives: ideas

I Have A Choice

Get this.

I’m wearing this eyeshadow, I’m wearing this full face of makeup, or at least what *I* consider a full face of makeup— for Myself.

I’m not wearing it because social media told me to.

I have a choice.

I have an option of whether or not I want to wear makeup.

Everyone seems to try to pinpoint what is “right” and what is “wrong” all the time, or they try to keep on everyone’s side to seem like they aren’t bias.

Now let me tell you, I care, I do. I care a lot about everyone I meet, what people think of me (semi-sometimes) because everyone feels this way, it’s just natural to care.

Everyone questions “am I good enough, is this winged liner even, do I even feel like wearing foundation today… no, but I’m going to wear it anyways because there’s this cute guy in my class and in order for me to work up the courage to even look at him I have to look inside my soul, find this confidence that’s buried somewhere, and LET IT FREE by wearing whatever make-up makes me feel damn GOOD on this day.”

Yes, that sentence was completely bombastic and slightly unnecessary.

But the key thing to remember out of what I just said is confidence.

Everyone has it, it’s fueled by different things. Me for instance, I do better at life in general when I feel like myself, when I feel good, whether that’s with make-up or without.

There used to be a time where I wore make-up because I felt like I had to. I felt naked without it, or I felt just completely not myself.

And sometimes I still do feel that way, but I’ve noticed the caring on that level has SUNK, let me tell you.

I went out in public, with no makeup, hadn’t washed my hair, I looked like I was going through a crisis slightly, because I kinda sort of was, and I took a smoothie to this guy that sort of liked me but I wanted to be clear we were just friends and I thought he was sweet.

SoooooOoOoooOOOOOO I went back in the house and immediately was asked “what, you went out like that?” and I said “yes, who cares? If he likes me anyways then he needs to see the real me, and accept me, right?”

*laughs at self *

…………………………………

ohhh my goddd

And then the other person just looked at me and smiled probably internally screaming “what happened to you?!?!?!”

But seriously, I’m sitting here telling you that you don’t have to do what everyone else is doing to feel good about yourself.

You don’t have to wear a full face of makeup; you don’t even have to wear any make-up.

And yes I know there are girls that exist who do both proudly and props to you, I am that person too—sometimes.

But the truth is, I just love makeup. And, I also just love rubbing my eyes.

Everyone stresses about being liked but it’s all about doing whatever you like— that will help you achieve this happiness and validation you’re searching for.

And if you’re really looking for likes, you need to be yourself. An original, not a copy of a neighbor or celebrity; you’ll be surprised how many positive responses you get when you yourself feel good about what you’re doing, wearing, and putting out into the world.

*P.S. I sort of want to film a video on this, do you have any thoughts on it? Am I missing anything or do you sort of relate to me at all? I’d love to hear. 🙂

Love,

Nat

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We Need to Chat about My Future

I am at a loss for words as I sit in the lobby of a building typing this, something that is out of my comfort zone a bit, because I’m not in the comfort of my room let alone in my hometown.

I used to think the dream was to be away from my hometown, to be off on adventures no matter whether it was a hike through some woods, a walk around a city, or on a plane (has happened few times for me) going somewhere entirely different.

I crave adventure.

I want new experiences.

And I want good memories to overshadow my awkward self that I love– but to a degree.

I used to believe I would be stuck forever in my room a shy, self-conscious (during my early teenage years) yet confident person with a desperate need to explore new opportunities and environments. Falling victim to having aspirations and hope, yet eventually with time, no matter how hard I worked or believed, fearing failure.

There is no failing.

Oprah Winfrey didn’t fail as she began her life as a talk show host, producer, actress etc. after being fired at 23 from her first reporting job.

Tina Fey didn’t fail, now a comedian and actress worked at the YMCA age 23.

Stephen King, an iconic author didn’t fail as he lived in a trailer and worked as a janitor age 24.

J.K. Rowling, (another iconic author) of the Harry Potter Series was practically homeless at the age of 28.

Vera Wang, a fashion designer known around the world didn’t design her first dress until age 40.

The late Julia child,  a chef you may have noticed, inspired the movie Julie and Julia and didn’t release her first cook book until age 49.

The late Alan Rickman, was not a widely known actor until age 42 when he landed his first role after deciding to stop pursuing graphic design.

And so on and so on…

So if someone tells me I need to give up and that I’ll never amount to anything– even if that person is me at times– I remind myself of these amazing people who got their start in the middle, and many with struggles.

Everything takes time, the issue is that my time is up on making a decision in regards to college decisions.

Choosing a major, choosing an area of focus, deciding where I’ll live next year and who the hell with, let alone whether or not I want to pursue my dream of traveling despite the realization that I actually like comfort… is mind boggling.

Yes, in a sense that comfort has been ripped away over the last few days, but whose to say it hasn’t been slowly building up over the course of a year.

Also known as, the mid-college crisis.

I know it will get better, but it is incredibly frustrating to remember this as I’m being stretched thin by my own unstable comprehension.

I know I can get through these decisions everyone says not to worry about, but the time is now and plain as day that I can either try for my dream and fail a few times in the process, or I can give up all together and settle.

I’m not one for settling, I’m one for finding an alternate way around a situation so that I can make the most out of what I’ve been given to work with.

Life can be crazy, challenging, and exhausting  but to write our own story we all have to go along with the ride and hope we end up somewhere amazing.

LET’S TAlK FIFTY SHADES OF GENIUS

Okay, so it’s currently 12:30 AM.

The video came out at 12:00 AM EST time.

I WAS PREPARED IF YOU COULDN’T TELL.

This due to the fact that I haven’t heard new music from Taylor Swift in ages and it was DUE with everything that’s happened in my life lately, this song hits pretty close to home.

Now, I want to talk about the video because I have a theory. I’m not sure what the director meant to do with the changing colors, but I have an idea, hear me out.

So you know that song “red” Taylor Swift wrote for her album “Red” back in 2012 right? Okay, well the album is heart-cuttingly beautiful in the sense that it grabs your soul by the suspenders and feels as if Taylor Swift has just thrown her heart out on the line, and taken all of ours with it.

The song RED has the line:

“Losing him was blue like I’d never known
Missing him was dark grey all alone
Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody you never met
But loving him was red”

I believe red stands for passion or love.

Green stands for jealousy, although not mentioned in Swift’s song “red,” but has been mentioned on a tour where she describes the color green as jealousy which people tend to do anyhow.

And blue stands for sad and upsetting emotions where you know you need to let go but can’t bring yourself to.

 

 

Now, in the video it begins with Zayn coming out of a fancy car in the rain as press jump up his ass to get a photo(figure of speech), and it’s simply him walking through a building facing the casual things (such as photography ninjas) artists sadly face these days.

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As he strolls into the elevator the green begins to change to red as he sings the line “I just wanna keep calling your name until you come back home” in Swift’s direction as the camera turns toward towards her and red filters between them before it turns to green right as Swift’s line begins.

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“I’m sitting eyes wide open and I got one thing stuck in my mind,” and changes to red as
“Wondering if I dodged a bullet or just lost the love of my life,” is sung–  “oh” the last word being green before becoming a regular camera setting with no mood lighting involved as Swift reflect’s on the nights she’s stayed up restless.

 

*Entering the room of Zayn is Swift ooo here we go*

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Red comes in flashes now as she sings certain words that suggest certain things. If you know what I MEAN. Although it could potentially be nothing like that, but considering it’s a song written for a fifty shade of grey movie…

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She pours wine and picks petals off of white roses (a symbol for true love, not red which I thought was the other way around).

“Until you come back home” is sung by Zayn and now the blue appears right before Swift’s line “I’ve been looking sad in all the nicest places”

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They then proceed to reflect on their relationship, Zayn looks to be holding a letter or photographs which he end up tossing across the room while Swift has her moment in the bathroom taring at herself in the mirror most likely thinking “girl what are you doing.”

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“What is happening to me”is when the blue comes into play again, in flashes along with red for less time.

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Zayn is then seen sitting in that sort of crouched position where shit has hit the fan and you feel like crying but you can’t cry sort of vibe as the light flashes blue.

The real kicker is as they sing the line “I just wanna keep calling your name until you come back home” repeatedly, light flashing red, normal coloring, and blue. They are turned away from each other in every scene with blue and red suggesting they can’t deal with the emotions which are going haywire.

 

 

At the very end, the lights are still flashing red and blue whilst instead of turned away, they are looking right at each other.

 

 

 

Beauty and The Beast

Beauty and The Beast is one of my favorite Disney films of all time.

Belle is no ordinary princess, she was not born into royalty nor whisked away by a handsome prince. She learned to love the prince for who he was, not through is appearance or what he could give her.

Before the beast stumbled into her life (I am going off the animation version, not the original tale of Beauty and The Beast) where she was considered “weird” yet beautiful by people in her town due to the fact that she read books. Her family also didn’t possess a lot of money, so spoiled is in no way a word to describe Belle.

As always, Belle does her thing and goes about her days, passing the time with a book or talking to her father about his inventions whilst Gaston continues to bug her and ask for her hand in marriage, that conceited son of a b–

 

Now, with the trailers coming out of the new “Beauty and the beast” live action film set to take place in theaters come March 17th (St. Patrick’s day fellow Irish– keep in mind, I only have partial Irish in my blood) it is easy to investigate the differences through the animated film and the soon to be aired, live action movie.

 

I’m not gonna lie, I can already tell lumiere is going to bother me during the entire film because he has two separate legs instead of a candlestick base. :’)

I’m still giving the movie a chance regardless of all of these changes (Of course, they’re attempting to make the movie into real life and it is difficult, hence the need for digital animation and autotune) but so many of these things really didn’t need to be altered??

I mean, chip as another example. I imagined him to be cute, not scare me with his eyes…

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I’m trying my best to keep an open mind, and I am still incredibly excited for it, but come on. That auto tune is insane.

The auto tune is however noticed prominently more on certain areas of the song rather than the entire thing, which isn’t detrimental.

The reason I love the musical movies (rent, les miz, but les miz especially because a lot of their scenes tended to be live rather than recorded and added to the film making it more raw and emotional) is due to the reality of the situation it delivers rather than pre-recorded or seen on a stage where a lot of the emotions aren’t picked up in facial expressions because they are so far away. Including films that are simply films until the addition of music (because music is something that everyone can understand and feel regardless of language or any sort of barrier between people).

Don’t even get me started about the dress, please. But, seeing the entire blue dress– I felt better about it than originally when there was only the image of the collar and I was just not having it haha.

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I imagined it to look like this fan-made (sorry, not sure who created it) image:

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As for the winter dress, I wish the puffy hood was still a thing, although the new dress is stunning as well.

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Made by toughtink on Instagram. I absolutely love her dress.

 

I don’t mind the beasts’ horns much, although wouldn’t it have been easier to keep them short like in the animation? Just throwing that out there.

I’m so excited for the movie, I’m sure everyone else is as well, it’s just a few changes we need to get used to even if we would go about them a different way. Although I’m not so sure I could forgive what they did to Chip and Lumiere, time will tell though.

If you envisioned any aspect of the movie to be different, please let me know what and how you would alter it. Also, If your super thrilled for the movie to FINALLY be released, please mention that too. 😛

Nat ❤

❤ Note: All photos and videos are not my own, these belong to the creators and uploaders. ❤

Ourselves

Decisions have the potential to ruin a person.

A decision on staying with someone after they’ve done you wrong.

A decision on moving across the country for something you love, instead of something practical.

A decision on throwing in the towel after you’ve had what feels like 1,000 chances on fixing a mistake that’s been eating you up inside, yet the other person may have never felt hindered by it to begin with.

It’s not easy to walk around feeling as though your holding up a sign that says ‘pity me’ while going through issues every 20-something, 40-something, or 60-something year old faces.

Life wouldn’t be fun if it was perfect– an age old fact.

Life would become boring and dull without any hardships or struggles along the way, easier however; maybe.

But easy isn’t always right.

In fact, easy is what I try to avoid.

But sometimes we need the easy way when we are too jumbled up to decipher the best plan for ourselves.

I don’t know what I’m doing right now, but I know that this will only lead to whatever giant step I’m headed towards down the line.

Thanks for listening to this randomness,

Nat