Not Yours 

** I wrote this back in November. I’m sharing it now because I’m going through old notes, and am finding a lot of poems, writings, pieces, whatever you want to call them.🌸All I want to add is that a whole lot can change in just one year.🎬** 

It’s been next to five months and I can still feel his lips on mine.

 I can feel his arms wrapped around my waist as he pulls me in for a hug. I always loved those. 

I can sense his eyes as my own follow a page of a book. 

I can hear his heart as it asks to be mine, but I refuse to take it. 

And now I understand why he ran when I finally came to the decision to express that I loved him. 

He couldn’t handle me. 

Back and forth I went, in fact I made a bet with myself on when he would get sick of me. Purely because, I wanted him too. 

I forced my way out of his heart in order to protect my own.

 But what I would come to find is that when I felt the time was right, he would vanish because something pretty and new had walked by. 

 And it was no surprise to me that I couldn’t keep his eye. 

But what would provoke me to believe I was at a loss when he had given up something he couldn’t see, something he defied in every sense of beauty, someone who claimed she was the queen. 

Oh dear heart, if only you knew. 

It was his choice, not yours, to let go of you. 

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